People Get Angry When They Don't Understand You.

We went to a faraway court today.

Today's session was to seek clarification on the consent order. It was in another state down South.

On the last date, there was a mediation. My client and his wife had negotiated, and they had reached an agreement. The court applauded them because they had settled the matter amicably. The lawyers shook hands. Everyone was smiling. The court announced a consent order.

We win and lose in life. That's normal. But we have to learn something from the experience.

Think of the Baby Before the Babe

If you go to an event and meet a babe...

And she connects with you, smiles at you, and says that she'll be in touch.

Remind yourself that you have a wife and kids at home.

What you invest your time in defines who you are. Who you invest yourself in determines who you will be.

For the Mrs

Here goes nothing.

Since this is a blog, it's not meant to be taken seriously. So here goes nothing.

Note: This post is meant for no one in particular. But it might resonate with you, in which case it's highly likely that you're a henpecked husband who is in terrible need for directions to the exit.

First up, is a poem for the pecking hen.

Have you ever felt that you've been a victim of mind-control? It could be an invading species of aliens has infiltrated your mind and made you a mindless slave to a mindless slave driver. With the rising popularity of mindfulness, it might be in your best interests to be a mindful slave to a mindful slave driver.

The Berlusconi Divorce

The UK's Daily Mail reports that Ms Noemi Letizia has denied that Italian Prime Minister is her father, despite her calling him "Papi". An excerpt from the report:

Noemi Letizia, 18, has been accused of sparking the divorce of the 72-year-old Premier from wife Veronica Lario which has exploded into a very public row.

Miss Lario announced the split by declaring: 'I cannot be with a man who spends time with under-age women.'

She accused her husband of 'consorting with minors' after he went to Noemi's 18th birthday party and allegedly gave her a gold and diamond necklace.

But despite calling Berlusconi 'Papi', the teenager is adamant he is not her father

Speaking with her parents by her side, she told the Times: 'No, absolutely not. That's my dad, over there.'

Berlusconi says he was at her birthday party by chance because he needed to speak to her father, Benedetto.

(Source: The Daily Mail, 9th May 2009. Berclusconi is NOT my father, insists the teenage girl at the centre of his divorce spat.)

Background
From the Wikipedia entry on Silvio Berlusconi:

Wife files for divorce

At the beginning of May 2009, Veronica Lario confirmed she was filing for divorce following her husband's attendance at a girl's 18th birthday party and buying her a gold necklace[110] in Naples. She claimed that Berlusconi had not attended his own childrens' 18th birthday parties,[111] and that she could not be with a man who "consorted with minors". [112] A week previously, she had also written an open letter expressing her anger at Berlusconi's choice of young, attractive female candidates—some with little or no political experience—to represent the party in the 2009 European Parliament elections. Berlusconi demanded a public apology for the third occasion he believed she had "done this to me in the middle of an election campaign", and stated that there was little prospect of his marriage continuing.[113]

Children
Silvio Berlusconi has five children, three from his marriage of 19 years to Veronica Lario and two from a previous marriage:

1. Marina Berlusconi
2. Pier Silvio Berlusconi
3. Barbara Berlusconi
4. Eleonora Berlusconi
5. Luigi Berlusconi

Jealous
So, why should an 18 year old's birthday party be of such concern to his wife? It could be that his wife felt intense jealousy.

She (Veronica Lario) also lashed out at the premier's reported attendance at an 18-year-old woman's birthday party in Naples, saying she was surprised "because he never came to the 18th of any of his children, even though he was invited."

(Source: Associated Press, 3rd May 2009. Italian premier Berlusconi's wife seeking divorce.)

Stormy relationship
The same report also stated (in effect) that the Italian Premier has had on-going trouble with his wife all this while.

Lario and Berlusconi met in 1980, wed 10 years later and have three children in their 20s. Berlusconi has two children from his first marriage.

His union with Lario has long been rumored to be in trouble — the two don't live together and she rarely is seen out with him. And rumors of affairs have swirled around each of them.

....

Berlusconi often has said it was love at first sight when he saw Lario, then a 24-year-old actress, performing at a Milan theater in 1980.

"When we met, she made me lose my mind," he once told the women's magazine A. "She's a special woman. ... She has been and is a wonderful mother. She has never embarrassed me, never."

Lario has largely shied away from her role as first lady, both during his current term as premier and when he held the post in 2001-06. But she occasionally broke her silence with stances that suggested an independent-minded personality. In one case, she defended pacifists protesting the Iraq war, which Berlusconi supported.

In 2003, Berlusconi acknowledged rumors linking his wife to a left-leaning philosophy professor, Massimo Cacciari, during a news conference with the Danish prime minister, Anders Fogh Rasmussen.

"Rasmussen is the most handsome prime minister in Europe," Berlusconi said to the surprise of both his Danish counterpart and reporters. "I'm thinking of introducing him to my wife, because he's much more handsome than Cacciari."

Money
A Forbes report dated 4th May 2009 states that Berlusconi is valued at USD$6.5 billion.

Italian Prime Minister Silvio Berlusconi has had an unimpressive time over the past year, as have other billionaires--he was one of many who saw his fortune dwindle in the global market turmoil, valuing him at $6.5 billion in March.

(Source: Forbes, 4th May 2009. Berlusconi: Bachelor Billionaire?)

According to the Forbes report, Italian laws mandate three years' separation, during which time alimony is given. The main issue that everyone is waiting for is how his property will be divided among his children from Veronica Lario and his children from a previous marriage.

Italy's curious divorce laws--introduced just 29 years ago--will buy Berlusconi some time: a couple must officially separate for three years before they are able to divorce; during the separation period, an alimony is payable to the spouse in the weaker economic position. However, alimony is only granted in around 20% of cases, says Chiara Saraceno, a sociologist. The separation of property comes only at the second stage--divorce. The biggest issue in the divorce, according to the Italian media, will be how the properties are divvied up between Berlusconi's children from his two marriages: he has two children from his first marriage, as well as his three children with Lario.

Strangely, I feel that division of property should not be an issue among the children until he passes away. That is when the will comes into effect.

Lawyers
Who are the lawyers acting for both sides? Veronica Lario has engaged Maria Cristina Morelli, based in Milan and better known for her work involving a euthanasia case. Silvio Berlusconi on the other hand has engaged "Padua, Italy-based lawyer Ippolita Ghedini". Both lawyers have yet to make any comment for the media. (Source: Bloomberg, 5th May 2009. Berlusconi’s Wife Chooses Englaro Family Lawyer for Separation.)

At Stake
The Singaporean Straits Times reported the incident, centering around the lawyers. Ippolita Ghedini is the sister of his regular lawyer.

Mr Berlusconi, meanwhile, has selected Ippolita Ghedini, a family law specialist who is the sister of his regular lawyer Niccolo Ghedini, to represent him in the split from Lario, the ANSA news agency reported.

The couple engaged in a bruising media-fuelled spat sparked last week by an open letter in which Ms Lario complained over her husband's roving eye.

Speculation over whether Ms Lario will seek damages from Mr Berlusconi, whose family's fortune is estimated at 6.5 billion euros (S$12.78 billion), filled the pages of Italy's press on Tuesday.

The couple opted for a 'separate property' regime when they married in 1990, so she would not be entitled to a portion of his fortune without suing him, press reports said.

Entitlement would rise for Mr Berlusconi's five children - three by Ms Lario and two from his first marriage - as well as for Mr Berlusconi himself, according to the financial daily Il Sole 24 Ore. -- AFP

(Source: Straits Times, 5th May 2009. Berlusconis pick divorce lawyers.)

Other cases
The Bloomberg report also lists two other high profile cases:

Berlusconi could become the second European Union leader to divorce in office in the past two years. French President Nicolas Sarkozy divorced from his second wife, Cecilia, shortly after his election in 2007, and months later married Carla Bruni, an Italian model and singer.

The Czech Republic’s outgoing Prime Minister Mirek Topolanek and his wife Pavla in 2007 confirmed media speculation about their separation. They have yet to divorce. Topolanek now lives with Lucie Talmanova, a deputy chairwoman of the lower house of parliament.

Maintenance Payments Under Divorce Orders

I was just chatting with a friend in court today. Divorced ladies have it tough, if their ex-husband refuses to pay the maintenance money to their ex-wife. Maintenance, includes maintenance for children, and maintenance for wife. The right thing to do is to enforce the order. But if the amount of maintenance is too small then the ex-wife is not likely to find a lawyer to enforce it for her. The solution is to follow the UK and make the ex-husband pay the maintenance money to the government. The government in turn gives an equal amount to the ex-wife. If the ex-husband does not pay, the government goes after him. But irregardless of whether he does (or does not) pay, the wife can still collect from the government. In turn she signs papers allowing the government to collect the amount due to her under the divorce order.

This would solve so much time and trouble. I also think that ex-husbands would not run away so easily from their obligations.

Here is something related: Maintenance payments -- Special Types of UK Court Orders (Source: HM Revenue & Customs)